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Arriving home after 2 weeks in a Psychiatric Hospital post my failed suicide attempt due to Autistic Burnout – seeing my teenage Daughter

Photo by Suzy Hazelwood on



I approach my front gate and reach for the remote on my set of house keys. I push the blue button with my left thumb and watch the motorized gate slide to the right. I drive up the driveway and park next to my house. I turn off the ignition and I just sit in silence to gather my thoughts.

My teenage daughter is inside. My mother also. They have been taking care of our house for the past 2 weeks while I was in hospital. They do not know that I have tried to commit suicide, I told them I had an accident when I was admitted and they thought I bumped my head and was there for concussion treatment.

How do I start to explain to my dear child what had happened? Will it upset her? will she freak out? Will she be angry? Will she be disappointed? Will she understand?


Her mother and I got divorced when she was just 2. She stayed with her mother until she was 7 and then came to live with me for the past 10 years. I was a father and mother to her. I taught her how to think, how to be a human, how to be the best version of herself, how to never give up. Now I am about to tell her that I am a hypocrite. I gave up on Life. Well, okay not entirely, you see. I can explain it to her, if she’ll let me…


I open the door and start walking towards the front door.

“Just tell the truth” I think to myself, “It is the best approach in life.”

I open the door and see her face light up 🙂

“Hello, Dad!” She smiles, “Welcome back!” she says as she hurries toward me for a hug.

I start to cry….

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